Partying like one of the guys. Stop here if you’re squeemish. Wait, if you’re squeemish, you shouldn’t even be here.

I went out with some guys from the office on Friday and holy shit, we had fun.  There was all kinds of inappropriate rubbing of body parts, extremely poor karaoke and I witnessed so much behavior that qualifies as blackmail material that I will never want for anything.  (Thank you camera in my phone, you are all kinds of awesome.)

But…I would never use that info to blackmail someone.   That’s why the guys are ok with bringing me (the chick) along.  I don’t get jealous (although I did lose some of the attention when we hopped to another bar and that pissed me off, cock-blocked without even wanting the cock!!) and I won’t tell their wives they ogled every waitress and I couldn’t care less if someone has a little too much to drink and whoops!, accidentally on purpose touches my boob. 

They know that when I say “Come here and show my kitty some love!”, I just mean come here and pretend like you’re going down on me and everyone will have a good laugh.  When I flip one of the guys off, he mimics jacking off and shooting cum all over table and we all move our drinks out of the way.

I did a bump and grind with a guy and a lesbian, 2 guys, then put on a little show all by my lonesome.   We sang till we were hoarse, laughed till we cried, I threw up because I drank Dragonberry rum and Diet Coke with no dinner, and I think I might have peed my pants but I’m not completely sure about that one.

It was all completely innocent and there were no regrets.  We all laughed and reminisced when we got in Monday morning, compared notes and asked questions because somebody invariably missed something.   I hear there were some pissed off wives which is just stupid but expected I guess.  They should be happy their hubbys had fun and let them do it once in a while without fear of “getting in trouble”, but I know that this is just not how it works.   Wives should get the same privilege (as I do).

The only thing hubby asked me was where we went and did I have fun.  He totally rocks the casbah.